Happy whatever, assholes

Christmas might be my least favorite holiday. I much prefer the ones where I don't have to do much beyond getting drunk and pretending to care about old presidents or civil rights leaders or trees or what the fuck ever. I hate having to pretend like I have such attributes as thoughtfulness and kindness, both of which are a waste of time. Also, if I hear Manheim Steamroller one more time, someone's gonna get garroted in the bathroom.

I'm just tired of the hype and insistence on consideration and animatronic Santas and visits from extended family and tasteless holiday treats and bullshit, hypocritical "peace on Earth" sentiments that don't last past New Year's Day. It's just too much effort for a holiday that involves a day off from work.

If I have to deal with the shitty music one more time, at least I want to fire two salvos of what I like into the mix. I mean, a human being can only listen to Bing Crosby so much before one insists on the Ramones and the Pogues. Really, these are the only two Christmas songs worth listening to. They're the only ones that capture what happens on Christmas - fighting with your girlfriend and ending up in the drunk tank.

I've only had one magic Christmas memory. Back in freshman year on college, I was still dating Cristina. I went to see her Christmas day, and we ended up on her small back patio - her socked feet on my shoes, dancing together to our own music while the very first snow of the year was falling. It's still probably my favorite Christmas memory and the only thing in my life that was borderline fairy tale.

Whatever. Why are you surfing the internet instead of spending the holidays with the people you care about a smidge more than me?

http://www.mysharefile.com/v/5138560/Pogues_Fairytale_of_New_York.mp3.html

http://www.mysharefile.com/v/9825726/Ramones_Merry_Christmas_I_Don_t_Want_to_Fight_Tonight_.mp3.html